I have a t-shirt I should probably throw away. It’s a little dingy. It doesn’t fit quite like it used to. But I keep it because the message still fits perfectly.
It says: “Women, Empower One Another!”
I’d like to think those words have shaped the way I lead. I’d like to think that when I wore that shirt, it wasn’t just a statement – it was an invitation. And I’d like to believe that this kind of empowerment is happening naturally and consistently in the church.
Sadly, it isn’t. At least not always.
I still remember a moment from a Women’s NEXT session at Exponential Global in Orlando a couple of years ago. A young woman stood up and shared how difficult it had been for her to find another woman leader to mentor her. She was serving on staff at a church and had approached an older, more experienced woman leader with a simple request: Would you be willing to meet with me and share some of your experience and wisdom?
The response she shared stunned the room.
The older woman declined, explaining that it had taken her a long time to be invited to the table – and she wasn’t willing to risk her place of influence by investing in someone in a “lesser” leadership role.
That moment still makes me deeply sad. And if I’m honest, it still makes me angry.
It reveals something we don’t often name out loud: Somewhere along the way, leadership can quietly shift from mission and expanding the Kingdom to self-preservation and position.
It shouldn’t need to be said, but clearly it needs to be repeated: None of this was ever supposed to be about us. Not our position. Not our platform. Not our seat at the table.
Everything we do – how we lead, how we steward influence, how we use our time – is meant to point people to Jesus. The mission has always been about helping more people find their way back to God through Him. And that mission moves forward only when we equip and empower more people to join the work.
Jesus said it plainly: “The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few.” (Matthew 9:37)
I don’t believe the woman who said no to mentoring started her leadership journey intending to make it all about herself. More likely, somewhere along the way, the enemy began whispering lies.
What if you make space for her and she’s more insightful than you?
What if her ideas are better received than yours?
What if she gets the opportunity you were hoping for?
Those “what ifs” rarely lead us toward our best faith-filled decisions. They often lead us to decisions made in fear. Toward decisions based on a desire to keep control. Toward protecting positions instead of advancing the mission.
At Community Christian Church, there’s a room we call the Leadership Training Center. For years, men and women at every stage of leadership have been trained in that space – from first-time apprentices to future church planters. And written boldly across the top of one wall is a verse we wanted everyone to remember and apply over and over again!
“And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others.” (2 Timothy 2:2)
That verse is more than Scripture on a wall – it’s a leadership philosophy. Multiplication has always required entrusting others. It has always meant inviting people to step into their God-given calling, not guarding influence as if it were scarce.
At Community, every leader in every ministry area and at every level is encouraged to apprentice someone – whether in kids or student ministry, the arts, small groups, first impressions, the parking lot team, or a new campus or lead pastor. Why? Because we serve people more effectively and the mission advances when more people are empowered to use their gifts.
And here’s the good news: Apprenticeship is simpler than we often make it. Look around. Who do you see potential in? Invite them for coffee – or tea, in my case – and tell them what you see. (We call it ICNU: I See In You.) Then invite them to explore leadership alongside you. I love that word – explore – because it removes pressure. It creates space for learning and discernment, not obligation.
My primary leadership lane at Community was small groups, and I loved it. I loved watching God restore hope, build spiritual family, and reveal His love and grace in powerful ways. I loved creating safe spaces for these things to happen. And yes, there were moments when I could have convinced myself that I was the one who needed to keep leading because of my experience. But I’m grateful I led in a church culture that continually reminded me: It’s not about you – it’s about the mission.
So in addition to leading dozens of groups, I apprenticed dozens of leaders. I invited them to watch, to learn, to practice. Over time, I entrusted them with more responsibility for leading the group. After each group, we reflected together about how the group went – what went well, and what could have been done differently. And when an apprenticeship season ended, we prayed and discerned next steps – considering not just skills, but spiritual health, emotional readiness, life season, and calling. And both the apprentice and I had to agree they were ready to move from apprentice to leader before that happened.
Only once did someone decide leadership wasn’t the right fit – and that was a good outcome too since I had invited them to explore. I didn’t want to talk someone into something that didn’t feel like it was a good fit for them. Exploration always allows for clarity.
At Exponential, we talk constantly about multiplication. We talk about the need for 16% of churches to become multiplying churches! Reaching the lost means mobilizing the church. Mobilizing the church means equipping leaders. And equipping leaders means making space at the table.
Jesus modeled this perfectly – giving His time to both the crowds and the few (His 12). If we want to be more like Jesus, we need to do the same.
To the women reading this: I know it took longer for us to be invited to the table. And I understand the temptation to protect that space once we arrive. But the Kingdom does not move forward through scarcity – it advances through faith.
So let me challenge you:
Scoot over. Make room. Lead from abundance, not fear.
Use your experience, influence, and voice to invite and include others in all the places and spaces! Call out gifting and give others opportunities to use and develop their gifts! Affirm and encourage! Link arms and move the mission forward!
Women, Empower One Another!
For the sake of the Kingdom.
For the sake of the mission.
For the sake of Jesus being known.
And honestly? Maybe it’s time to print a few more t-shirts.
